How would YOU kill a zombie?

[GEAR771]

I just figured this might be a fun topic to discuss. List some ways you would kill a zombie. Preferiabily with what you own in you're home or BOB. Feel free to be creative in all the goery details.

I would kill a zombie by first, going into my kitchen and grabbing my 7in. long steak knife. And jab it into the Zeds face, just under the jaw line. Grab the knife, and use it as a crowbar, and break its jaw off, or at least break it. Then run up stairs and grab my tool box, grab a hammer or a utility knife and finish it off.


EDIT: We assume that zombies are dawn of the dead style. Fast, hard to kill and possiably mutacisous ( I have poor spelling )

[Slugg]

To be honest, I would probably try to quitely pick them off from my house. With a bow and arrow or crossbow. That is if I get one by the event happening. My plan isn't to kill as many zombie as possible. Its more of just, keep alive and only kill them if they are in the way.

EDIT: But what I was meaning to say is this. I would try to do it with drawing the least amount of attention possible.

[Jeriah]

"Just shoot them in the head."

That's the right answer, by the way. Every zombie movie seems to confirm it. But, if we're just doing this as an exercise in creativity...

1. Shoot in head with firearm.
2. Shoot in head with bow & arrow (my current ones might be inadequate but good ones would work)
3. Crush skull with pick handle
4. Crush skull with aluminum baseball bat
5. Crush skull with claw hammer
6. Split skull with Gerber Sport Axe (in BOB).
7. Split skull with Woodman's Pal.
8. Split skull with tomahawk.
9. Split skull with khukri (current one isn't very sharp or well made)
10. Split skull with machete (I am skeptical about the effectiveness of this)
11. Bash in head with shovel
12. Bash in head with e-tool
13. Bash in head with metal-headed cane
14. Bash in head with holly wood walking stick
15. Bash in head with Maglite
16. Run over skull with Jeep Cherokee
17. Spear in head with atlatl (I'm not good enough to actually do this, I think)
18. Stomp in its head with my boot
19. Push it down the stairs into the basement, then drop something heavy on its head
20. Trap it in a building, then set the building on fire
21. Push it through a hole in the ice, deal with it in the spring.
22. Push it out of an airplane (don't own one of these, but, you know...I fly on them sometimes...)
23. Push in front of el train (this method is definitely lethal, there are at least a couple of el suicides each year here)
24. Push into shark tank at Shedd Aquarium, Sea World, etc. (might result in zombie sharks, or the zombie might kill the sharks)
25. Send it back in time to fight dinosaurs

Um...that's all I've got.

[callista]

Right now, with the equipment at hand, and assuming I couldn't get away, I'd grab my heavy walking stick and try to bash its skull in. I don't have any firearms, because money is tight and I'm too attached to eating, and I'm not into getting any closer than I have to, so I wouldn't go for a hammer or a knife. My main zombie (and "human-out-to-get-you" strategy) has always been running, hiding, diplomacy, or intimidation, and only if that fails, fighting. In a fight, even the winner can get hurt, so, not unless necessary. Anyway, I don't have any real training, just this self-defense class thing that just about every female on their own has taken at some time or another. I have a feeling that kicking a zombie in the shin, spraying him with mace, or stomping down on his foot isn't going to help much.

[Rekov]

I'm with Slugg on the whole keeping a low profile thing. I think hiding out until all the idiots get turned and wander off is the best strategy. The key is having enough supplies to hold out as long as you need to, and knowing when to leave. If they broke into my house there are any number of blunt objects that could easily be used to bash in a few heads.

[Trent]

My personal plan is to get everyone inside, board the house up, and avoid going outside for as long as possible. If we do encounter a member of the living dead, dispatch with a single shot from a .22 LR(saving the bigger stuff for more dangerous two-legged predators). Don't get close under any circumstances, just shoot them. I doubt that I'll burn through a single brick of .22 with low population of my area.
That's if they are pathetically slow. Otherwise, it's shotgun time.

[madwolf]

Fire!! The Biblical strength cleanser!!!!!!

[Baba Brad]

Probably bore it to death by relating my day at work or what happens on the 15 hour flight that I make monthly.

Usually works with non-zed ypes, should work with a zed.

[Wolfe4086]

A Sam's Club sized can of porkNbeans and a zippo.

[donjulio]

I would negotiate and find a peaceful resolution to our differences.

[poodle]

I thing running one over in an APC while enormous speakers play gothic organ music would be ok. So long as I am in something that they can't get into. Failing that, 12 gauge to the head so that it explodes like a ripe melon is always worth a few style points. Last but not least teleport them to endor with a few predators and aliens and just sit back and watch from orbit (sorry, slightly out there but you did ask).

[Dagger6]

Mobile wood chipper!

[dogbane]

By removing the head or destroying the brain. I repeat: By removing the head or destroying the brain.

[bonanacrom]

I prefer my tactical combat 4 slice toaster ! Bash- Bash- Bash ! Gear771 I would like to hear more on this tactic you have on breaking a jaw with a 7 inch kitchen knife ?

[MilknCheese]

I'd begin with a strongly worded letter but if they persist in being undead I would lobby for trade sanctions followed by a UN Resolution.

[BEar667]

From a high fortified place with a rifle.

[GEAR771]

I prefer my tactical combat 4 slice toaster ! Bash- Bash- Bash ! Gear771 I would like to hear more on this tactic you have on breaking a jaw with a 7 inch kitchen knife ?

You can break a jaw with a small butter knife, if you get it opn the joint.
You can rip it off with a little force from said knife.
And you can get both of them, with a 7 inch knife.
And can rip it off, along with half the Zeddies face.

[callista]

Well, yeah, if the dang thing stays still long enough to let you carefully insert your butter knife. Really, if you've got nothing but a butter knife and you're not cornered, I'd advise you to retreat before you get dead.

[bonanacrom]

I have always been under the inspiration that if you grab someone by the ear with one hand and put the other hand on the top of there head you can rip that ear right off with the right amount of force ! But you where talking about zombies right ? Why would you want to poke-em with a little knife from the kitchen when you could use your 4 slice combat toaster ?

[Vampire]

mutacisous

Grab them by their facial hair!

[GEAR771]

I have always been under the inspiration that if you grab someone by the ear with one hand and put the other hand on the top of there head you can rip that ear right off with the right amount of force ! But you where talking about zombies right ? Why would you want to poke-em with a little knife from the kitchen when you could use your 4 slice combat toaster ?

Lucky Americans, we dont get 4 slice combat toasters, all we get are combat butter knives and nuclear powerd microwaves...

[Fire Arms]

The way i'd kill a zombie is simple and obiviously the thing that any other fully trained zombie survivor would do....

I'd grab the nearest object and beat the acursed zombie till he's on his knees.Then i'd kick him away run,screaming and begging for my mother and take my 12 gauge into the bathroom.(the safest room in the house weird i know)Then when he breaks the door i'd shot like i'm in some kinda of insane and poorly produced action movie.when he hits the floor mootions less i'll cry for 4 hours and then go insane,followed by me commiting suicide.

[poodle]

LOL aaagh nothing like the human touch. You forgot to mention crap yourself and vomit copiously.

[Lucretius]

Fire!! The Biblical strength cleanser!!!!!!

Nooo! Don't do it! Burning zombies will just shamble around setting shit on fire!