How did you get your significant other on board?

[HonkyTonkTN]

Well, if the other isn't into prepping, try camping. Get a pop-up for a small family or a travel trailer. Try one or two camp grounds that are semi-off the grid. Then go boondocking where not grid functions nor hook-ups are available. Mainly by a nice lake and plenty of outdoor beauty. Doing something like this helps the other spouse learn about making prepps for a trip.

We did this for 5 years. We added things to the prep due to the camping off the grid life like ...

- Lodge cookware
- Machete
- Solar panel, batter, charge controller
- Propane tanks for heating and hot water.
we did the solar water heating of the water later.
- Berkey water filtration. (pre-filtered the water with coffee filters) Easy to get lake water to use.
- LED lighting that uses so little energy.
- dehydrated foods
- Waste water and trash easy to bury.
- good camp songs
- family time
- visited several state parks and off the trail places.
- camped once at Walmart. Not easy, hard to sleep with traffic zipping by from the interstate.
- etc ....

Even without an RV, travel trailer or camper, one can use a three man tent that is easily rolled up into a transport sack.

People who RV or camp have better skills for bugging out or weathering the storm of zombies.

[TripleThreat]

Good luck to all

[Doctorr Fabulous]

I don't even...

What The Fuck.

[duodecima]

I don't even...

What The Fuck.

Yep.

Bottom line of what I think is, this thread is not the place to have this discussion. "if you're spouse won't go along woth your prepping it's because you're not enough of a "winner" (easily translated into, you're too much of a looser) is not a particularly helpful observation for people who are trying to deal with that issue. Extra money to prep with, so other things can be a priority is of course a great and helpful thing - in this economy, "earn, earn, earn" is not merely a matter of personal choice about how hard you want to work.

This completely fails to provide anything relevant to women with the same problem - if our men won't prep, we're not supposed to care, because he's a winner and we care about what he's interested in, right? Also, what's it say about those of us comfortably out-earn our male partners? (And those here who are outearned by their female partners? )

Also "I didn't mean to be offensive, I'm just saying what I think," doesn't cut it. I'm sure a number of people here sincerely think things I find offensive, and I'm even more sure that people here would be offended by some if what I think. Doesn't mean we shouldn't think, discuss, work to change things in the world we think should be changed - we absolutely should do these things. But we don't do that discussion here. There's some examples regarding race, class, and sexual orientation , in addition to gender, that also form a backround for challenges people face with preparedness - but this just ain't the place to go there.

[Blacksmith]

Females, again not just humans, will tend to mate with mates who show the best ability to protect and provide for his offspring and his mate. Males, again not just humans, are drawn to mates who offer the perceived traits that will increase the offspring's chance of survival. Males, in most cases, will try to mate with as many females as possible to try to ensure his genetic legacy.

I think in most case the male would like to NOT ensure his genetic legacy.

I will continue to not use profanity at women, nor beat them, nor rape them.

I really hope so.

[TripleThreat]

Good luck to all

[Blacksmith]

Ha, Ha, Ha.. ha ha hemm

[Caenus]

Charlie Sheen, is that you?


A leader, simply put; influences other people into action. It has nothing to do with their own qualifications or past results or puts any real value on decision making. Managers make decisions, leaders influence.

[Doctorr Fabulous]

Charlie Sheen, is that you?


A leader, simply put; influences other people into action. It has nothing to do with their own qualifications or past results or puts any real value on decision making. Managers make decisions, leaders influence.

I was taught that people follow a leader because the WANT to, whether by charisma or logic. People follow a dictator because they have to.

Anyway, Triple Threat your logic is shoddy, your statistics, while accurate, reflect the sample of America as a whole, not the prepper community, and seems solely based around patriarchal hetero-machismo. The thread title is "spouses" not "wives" and should be able to encompass husbands, wives, and partners equally without resorting to 1960s era "Leave It To Beaver" social roles.

[ninja-elbow]

If I am into prepping, and want to have a partner that is also into prepping, then I choose a partner that is either already into it or open to being into it. If I choose to have a partner that is not into prepping or camping and then later complain about that or have misgivings, I have failed in choosing a partner. One must accept reponsibility. An individual cannot, ethically, force another individual into something they are not into.

Partnerships on the level of marriage of any color is not something to be treaded into lightly. I am 41 and getting married for the first time this year. I did this for a few reasons and the above was one of them.

[Tater Raider]

My life partner and I are seriously into prepping. She insists, in fact, sometimes to the point of making my wallet cry and me pull out my hair. Then there's the sudden, "I need money now and I'm done doing a blessed thing until I get it!" routine that gets old and yet she makes me happy.


My Significant Other

Now get off your damn high horse. General trends are what they are and individuals break the mold all the time so what you can paint in broad terms doesn't apply to the specifics of "How did you get your Significant Other on board?" Emphasis mine.

Besides, that's not the real question either. The real question is as follows:
"What advice can you give someone that wants to get their significant other into prepping?"

Also, if you start something with, "Don't take this the wrong way," "I don't mean to offend, but," or variations thereof or conclude it in a similar matter it means it is guaranteed that you are gonna piss someone off. Every marriage is different, people have differing ethics, religious, and political beliefs, and so on.

Please note, finding your perfect soulmate doesn't mean diddly on prepping and it's bullshit anyways. People make it work or don't, should get together or shouldn't have, and so on.

Mind you, I'm twice divorced, but my second ex is a prepper (we complimented each other well here at times with our differing focal points and thought processes) and I think we pretty much got each other on board, but seeing as how this is about prepping and not how to stay married I think my advice works too, which is this:

Ask, "Hey, if the smoke alarm went off at 2am, would we just get out with the clothes on our back? Maybe we should have a bag we can grab and keep it central to the house so we can grab it and go if the wiring decides to be faulty. We could call it the 'Grab Bag' and maybe we should do a fire drill, maybe talk it out with the kids too. What do you think?" It engages the SO and intruduces the BOB at the same time. Also, it works (based on personal experience - worked with 2 out of my 3 kids, and if you think they aren't significant others to me then you are oh so very wrong in oh so many ways and I'll be happy to hand you a crowbar so you can get your head out of your ass).

Hope I didn't offend anyone.




Oops.

[Caenus]

viewtopic.php?f=22&t=94767&p=2114623#p2114623

[Fletch]

If I am into prepping, and want to have a partner that is also into prepping, then I choose a partner that is either already into it or open to being into it. If I choose to have a partner that is not into prepping or camping and then later complain about that or have misgivings, I have failed in choosing a partner. One must accept reponsibility. An individual cannot, ethically, force another individual into something they are not into.

Partnerships on the level of marriage of any color is not something to be treaded into lightly. I am 41 and getting married for the first time this year. I did this for a few reasons and the above was one of them.

QFT, +1, plus one, agreed, wise post is wise

[Blitzen2k5]

If I am into prepping, and want to have a partner that is also into prepping, then I choose a partner that is either already into it or open to being into it. If I choose to have a partner that is not into prepping or camping and then later complain about that or have misgivings, I have failed in choosing a partner. One must accept reponsibility. An individual cannot, ethically, force another individual into something they are not into.

Partnerships on the level of marriage of any color is not something to be treaded into lightly. I am 41 and getting married for the first time this year. I did this for a few reasons and the above was one of them.

Oh I dont think so sir. When you meet your significant other its not checking off a list in a catalog. "Oh this one comes with a 100 CD changer and the other only has a 6 CD changer. Think I will go with the first one."

You dont "choose" a partner. It just happens. There is no rhyme or reason to it. It just hits you. "This is the one I am meant to be with." and that is it. And its the differences that make a marriage interesting. If she was just like me.... It would be freaking boring.

Apart of marriage is sharing. Sharing each other's lives. Including the differences. My wife likes ballroom dancing. I never even thought about it before I met her. Now though I go too and enjoy the time we spend dancing. I like video games. She never even played a video game until we were married. Now she plays them too. See? Sharing.

But on that same note there are things that I like or she likes that the other doesnt. Like scuba. I love scuba. She can barely swim and hates the idea. But doesnt mind me going. She is a practicing catholic. I am as well just not practicing. I dont mind her doing the church thing and such. (Not starting a religious debate here. Just saying our differences)

And then there is the things we have in common. We both love martial arts. She is more trained then me because her whole family is trained. Its a way of life for them. But we do that together. We also love cooking. Its a major event to us. She and I both grew up on farms. Hers was a poultry farm and mine was a dairy farm. So we have that and more in common.

But that is what its about. You dont grab a list and say "Ok she has to be into this and that and this over here. But has to hate this other thing and that thing and so on....." You cant do that. When you meet the right woman or man for you its like lightening. And it doesnt matter if she is or isnt into something that you are. You just know they are the one your going to spend the rest of your life with.

And I figure I am right as we are well passed the average time for divorce. I think the average is around 7 years. We hit the 15 year mark May 14th this year and still going strong.

Not to mention when we were married I dont think "prepping" was even a word. There was no BOB, GHB, INCH, TEOTWAKI, etc.... I didnt even know what it was until a few months ago.

But she is on board now as I said in a previous post. She has gotten into now as well. And its thanks to advice from one poster earlier on in this thread. They got me thinking about it differently and she now has no problem with it and is joining in. So all is good.

[ZombieGranny]

I like your post very much.

I had taken the other post to be saying 'if you like tall blonds, then don't marry a short redhead - but if you do, don't even think about making her bleach her hair and wear stiletto heels'.
And don't go drooling after tall blonds anymore.
---
A hippie comes up to a young redneck girl's father and says 'sir, I want to marry your daughter...'



Believe it or not we're still together.

[LyraJean]

I went in with a list. But then my husband and I met online. My list wasn't very long and mostly consisted of stuff he would put up with me. Mine consisted of having a job so that we wouldn't end up homeless and hungry and put up with my social weirdnesses and lack of Donna Reed skills. He wanted someone who could and would cook and wash dishes. Everything else was pretty negotiable. We'll be married for 3 years this September. There were quite a few people who didn't think we would last 6 months because of the way we met.

We talked a lot and when I say a lot. I mean 2-4 hours a night for 6 months before we even met in person.

My dad was similar. He and his wife also met online. He had to find someone who was okay with being with a person who is twice divorced, has adult children, and not interested in having any with my dad.

Historically, marriages didn't just happen and being in love was the last item on the list. If it was even listed at all. And it usually wasn't up to the people getting married but between their parents. For both the woman and man.

Your scenario doesn't take into account of prepping after you are married for some time. I mean just because you are married doesn't mean you stop growing as a person and do not pick up new hobbies or interests.

[Blacksmith]

I simply found someone who was like minded and agreeable to begin with. In most ways I hit the lottery. It has been nearly 20 years and we have been very happy the whole time. We have just the right amount of oddness for each other. Skills can be learned. Changing a mindset is a near impossible.

[michaelplummer1]

I am just going to by double of everything and put it in a bag for her and when the SHTF i will grab hers and mine and we will be ok.

[Mrbeefy]

I simply found someone who was like minded and agreeable to begin with. In most ways I hit the lottery. It has been nearly 20 years and we have been very happy the whole time. We have just the right amount of oddness for each other. Skills can be learned. Changing a mindset is a near impossible.

You just summed up my relationship with Cheekypegasus !

[Mrbeefy]

I am just going to by double of everything and put it in a bag for her and when the SHTF i will grab hers and mine and we will be ok.

I had considered that but luckily my wife is on board and we're in the plannin stages of a BOB and GHB for her

[EVEREADY]

Just take it slow and don't shove it down her throat (prepping info that is)..

She doesn't need to see all the gear you are buying straight away, as it will just look like you have spent shoe money in her eyes..

TV is a good in.. Doomsday Preppers, along with some Dual Survival, and throw some movies in once in a while..

Take her out on bushwalks..

But yeah, take it slow I reckon..

[Deenie7]

TV is a good in.. Doomsday Preppers, along with some Dual Survival, and throw some movies in once in a while.

Considering that Doomsday Preppers has made at least a couple of the show's featured preppers practically disown the show, claim that the producers made them only talk about certain disasters, and otherwise overplayed their "wackiness" - I'm not sure that's such a good idea. I know it completely turned me off, and I'm the prepper in my family!

And I know this is an older thread, but seriously, for anyone else in this situation, start slow. It's National Preparedness Month - one way that might help is to start with the various organization websites like FEMA, American Red Cross, Do1Thing, the CDC (especially their zombie preparedness materials), etc. Look to see if your city/county has a disaster preparedness/info website and what their plans and alert methods are. Talk about meet-up spots, like if something terrible happens while one/both of you are out and one of you can't get to the house, where do you meet? It's easy to claim you'll call someone but in big disasters, you may not be able to reach someone by cell phone - it's hard enough around here to get a signal at 5 pm on Fridays sometimes.

Discuss various disasters that could harm you - for instance, around here it's tornadoes, thunderstorms, and blizzards for the most likely culprits, but other than storm damage/getting snowed in, the more likely after-effects include loss of electricity for days. We also live within a couple blocks of a major train line, so there is the rare but possible chance of a train derailment which could include flammable or otherwise hazmat cargo.

If you're in a situation where you think you might have to do an extended walk on a bug-out, see if camping is interesting to your significant other.

One thing that's about always appreciated and understood is emergency kits for the car, especially if you travel in unpopulated areas. Stow water, a little food, car hazard triangles/flares, a flashlight, fire extinguisher, relevant tools, etc.

Talking about preparedness by starting with very small things designed to make your lives easier and safer is the best way to start with a wary SO who may not be into the more "bushcraft"-type aspects.

[wee drop o' bush]

By picking the right moments to promote ZS.
Today for example I hadn't much in the way for lunch so I raided my food prep larder & made canned chicken sammiches. Whilst my husband was nomming them I said 'having canned food and other food preps is partly what ZS is about. It's useful to have food stored that you can fall back on'
When the footage of people displaced by Hurricane Isaac was on the news I mentioned that hurricane preparedness & knowing what to do during one is what ZS is about. When we were watching a program about the Joplin Tornados I said that in those circumstances ZS helped out as much as it could, in full cooperation with the emergency services so it wouldn't get in their way; and organised food and supply drives. It also organises blood drives and is a charity.
He's definitely coming round to both ZS and the idea of prepping
He still doesn't want me to learn to shoot or get a gun though.

[Browning 35]

For us it revolved around three events/things....

• Breaking down in the desert out in the middle of nowhere and having all the tools, food, water, gas and fluids on hand to deal with the situation. This convinced her of the need for car kits.
• When we were moving cross country and in two separate cars and she was following behind a car-load of Gangbanger looking guys came up beside her, started swerving their car at hers, forced her off the road and pulled over right in front of her to block her off. I saw what was happening and pulled over at the same time, grabbed my gun and ran back to deal with the situation. The guys in the car had started to get out, saw me coming, got back in and took off swerving their car at me on their way out. This convinced her of the need for a gun.
• Took her to the range and it turned out that she loved trap and skeet shooting.

I wouldn't say that my wife's completely on board, but she sees the value in being prepared.