Zombietools.net
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Zombietools.net
http://zombietools.net
Their swords:
http://zombietools.net/tools/
Awesome pictures, too.
http://zombietools.net/gallery/cat/C2/
Their swords:
http://zombietools.net/tools/
Awesome pictures, too.
http://zombietools.net/gallery/cat/C2/
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- zXzGrifterzXz
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Cool marketing idea. They do look pretty neat but judging from the site it seems like they would also be a bit expensive though I didn't see a price tag on the site itself.
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-NFPA 1006 Rescue Technician
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My Aid Bag
*Standard medical disclaimer applies to all of my posts, YMMV, Always check CNS before and after, never let the new guy drive, don't attempt anything you read here without proper supervision..... Blah Blah Blah*
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DotD
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- Jeriah
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I would not apply the results of my coconut test to these products. My machete was the standard, thin, sheet-metal type. If theirs is cut from thick enough spring steel, it might possess adequate weight and power to cleave coconuts well. They give its weight as 2lb., which is the same as the Woodman's Pal IIRC. I'd really have to pick one up to have a solid opinion, but my first impression is that their Urban Bone Machete would be a fair sight better than a normal machete...but I think I'll stick with my Woodman's Pal.BethDeath wrote:Some of the pictures are cool but didn't Jeriah prove that blades just aren't that great when trying to kill the undead?
Now if they sold some tricked out MagLites....
And the Apocalax, as a long sword, would really have to be tested separately.

From the pics, I think those would do a fair job of decapitating/splitting zed heads. I'm not sure if the stylized hafts on those weapons would be uncomfortable or surprisingly comfy.
I suggest someone else buys one, so I can live vicariously through them.
I suggest someone else buys one, so I can live vicariously through them.
That rifle on the wall of the labourer's cottage or working class flat is the symbol of democracy. It is our job to see that it stays there."
-George Orwell
-George Orwell
They may be sharpened, and made of good steel, they are still designed to look cool, anti-zombieish and very post-apocalyptic. For real survival, pick a real tool.
I hate it when I don't have time to think of a whitty exit line.Seanwins wrote:Zed = Dead stupid thing that wants to bite you a lot.
Sick sig?
"The blade is heat-treated for hardness, tempered for flexibility, and sharpened like there’s no tomorrow." heh.
I need to figure out a way to give my truck a bath in ferric chloride acid. That would make an kickass post apocalyptic camo pattern.
I need to figure out a way to give my truck a bath in ferric chloride acid. That would make an kickass post apocalyptic camo pattern.
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- TheFreakinBear
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The answer you are looking for is the "Phone Cord Wrapped Katana".WaD wrote:Which of the two do you think would be the better at battling zombies?
If you run into someone, and their katana's handle is wrapped in phone cord - RUN. That means it's so strong, it'll be able to cut straight through a tank like a hot knife through butter.
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Jesus H Christ...
If you really must have a sword then pick the common or garden cruciform hand and a half sword. Perfectly balanced, can be used one handed or two handed, can parry an opponents blow, has a weighted pommel for bashing and the cross guard can be used as a rudimentary pick. A mighty weapon fit for a noble warrior. When thats the alternate you do you really want what is essentially a long razor with a handle stuck to the end?
If you really must have a sword then pick the common or garden cruciform hand and a half sword. Perfectly balanced, can be used one handed or two handed, can parry an opponents blow, has a weighted pommel for bashing and the cross guard can be used as a rudimentary pick. A mighty weapon fit for a noble warrior. When thats the alternate you do you really want what is essentially a long razor with a handle stuck to the end?
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\kyle wrote:"The blade is heat-treated for hardness, tempered for flexibility, and sharpened like there’s no tomorrow." heh.
I need to figure out a way to give my truck a bath in ferric chloride acid. That would make an kickass post apocalyptic camo pattern.
Lawn pesticide sprayer. Wear gloves.
If that doesn't sound safe to you, try genetically engineering a twelve-ton bombadier beetle with reformulated ass-chemicals to spray it for you.
The SERIOUS way to do it, I think, would be to remove each body panel and dip it separately.

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Thank you all for coming over and checking out our site. And for the feedback. We're just getting started in our venture and have a number of business/marketing kinks and challenges to work out, and getting candid responses to our site and blades helps a lot.
We wanted to give you our take on some of the points raised here. First, our general take on blades and the zombie apocalypse. We are swordsmen and martial artists. This venture grew from a group of people who have met in a back-alley every Saturday afternoon for the past 7 years to beat the shit out of each other. We fight with shinai, rapiers, sideswords and fists. We throw knives, spikes, and anything else with a point. We cut shit with sharp blades. And we drink a lot of beer and talk about zombies.
So, given our experience, we wouldn't go into the zombie apocalypse without a blade (or beer). It would be a waste of our training. And, frankly, we'd give a nut to have a chance at decapitating a shambling bitch or 50. We don't think that blades are for everybody. Someone who picked up a blade without at least a minimum of handling experience would be as dangerous to themselves as they'd be to z's.
Beyond that, we think that a blade would be a very useful tool in conjunction with a firearm. We've noticed in discussions of the z apocalypse that many people put a great deal of faith in firearms. Too much faith, in our opinion. Many folks seem to imagine themselves in their fortified bunkers sitting on top of a mound of ammo (which they'll get around to purchasing real soon now). Aside from the obvious problem of ammo depletion in a zombie outbreak on the scale of what was imagined in World War Z, we feel that mobility may be as important to survival as fortification and firepower. We're preparing for both eventualities. And ammunition is not very mobile. If you have to abandon your fortified position in a hurry, you're going to have to leave your main survival strategy behind for someone smarter to discover later. Which is why our mobile survival plan includes a good mountain bike (so we don't have to depend on fuel and roadways which may be jammed with abandonded vehicles and filled with z's), a powerful sidearm, and a blade.
We're pretty confident that our blade would be effective against z's. We've made them from quality steel and given them a *very* sturdy spine (the main problem with cheap machetes), while at the same time tapering and reducing the blades for balance and speed. The momentum generated is sufficient to sink the sweet spot of these blades nice and deep into freshly milled lumber. Although we haven't been able to support this claim with tests (dammit! anyone want to give us an undead loaner?), we're fairly confident that a good blow at the base of the skull would, at the least, reduce the spinal column to a pulp with the force of the blow alone, if not remove a z's head completely. Exactly how they'd perform on a skull is unknown, but we're looking into ways to test. Thanks for the coconut test idea! We're going to have some fun with that one, and we'll put some video of the results on our site.
Next, we imagine situations in which using a firearm would be dangerous. In many fictional apocalyptic settings, writers have imagined that z's are attracted by loud sounds. Given that, one can imagine many scenarios in which one might have the need and capacity to dispatch a couple z's but not the huge throng that a couple shotgun blasts might attract. A skillfully used blade could handle the problem with stealth. And then there's various mop-up scenarios where it would be a shame to waste bullets on disabled z's....
Finally, there's the distasteful matter of protection against other humans. As I'm sure we've all imagined, under apocalyptic circumstances, frightened, hungry and desperate masses of other humans are likely to be as dangerous, if not moreso, that z's. After the first week of the apocalypse, and the majority of these people have expended the box of ammo they had with their household firearm, most are likely to be armed only with melee weapons. And we'll take our own blades over a Louisville Slugger, an agricultural machete or a cheap Chinese-made katana any day.
As for specific concerns about our blades, some folks seem to take issue with the "pointy" elements in the handle design. None of these elements are very sharp, and the handles are individually sculpted for a good grip and comfort. When shaping the handles, we're handling the blades, swinging them around, and chopping shit to make sure they feel good to us. And they feel good to us. We really like the index finger grip, which gives extra control and ensures a solid grip, especially when pulling the blade out when it's lodged firmly into something (like a skull) and covered in slick gore. The point at the end with the lanyard hole *might* be an issue under weird circumstances, but at the worst it would give you a good scrape. It's very unlikely to give you a puncture wound. But this is an issue we'll continue to think on and may alter slightly in future designs. Also, as an aside, after years of having our knuckles bashed by blades, we're in the habit of wearing quality leather gloves when weilding swords. We wouldn't dream of going into a z-apocalypse without them.
The most disappointing response we've received thus far is the one that mistrusts our weapons because they look cool (thanks!) and we have good photography (and, again, thanks!). It's understandable, but still really sucks, that we're in the habit of viewing quality and style, function and aesthetics, as incompatible. We're striving for both. AND we're trying to keep the costs of these blades out of the >$500 range, which is the price realm you're dealing with for many really good, handcrafted swords. It may be that we can't make a business with high quality, good looking and affordable blades. But we're going to give it a go.
We're currently working on some video projects that will show you these blades in action. We'll post here when they're ready.
Thanks again for the feedback.
-Chris
ZombieTools
We wanted to give you our take on some of the points raised here. First, our general take on blades and the zombie apocalypse. We are swordsmen and martial artists. This venture grew from a group of people who have met in a back-alley every Saturday afternoon for the past 7 years to beat the shit out of each other. We fight with shinai, rapiers, sideswords and fists. We throw knives, spikes, and anything else with a point. We cut shit with sharp blades. And we drink a lot of beer and talk about zombies.
So, given our experience, we wouldn't go into the zombie apocalypse without a blade (or beer). It would be a waste of our training. And, frankly, we'd give a nut to have a chance at decapitating a shambling bitch or 50. We don't think that blades are for everybody. Someone who picked up a blade without at least a minimum of handling experience would be as dangerous to themselves as they'd be to z's.
Beyond that, we think that a blade would be a very useful tool in conjunction with a firearm. We've noticed in discussions of the z apocalypse that many people put a great deal of faith in firearms. Too much faith, in our opinion. Many folks seem to imagine themselves in their fortified bunkers sitting on top of a mound of ammo (which they'll get around to purchasing real soon now). Aside from the obvious problem of ammo depletion in a zombie outbreak on the scale of what was imagined in World War Z, we feel that mobility may be as important to survival as fortification and firepower. We're preparing for both eventualities. And ammunition is not very mobile. If you have to abandon your fortified position in a hurry, you're going to have to leave your main survival strategy behind for someone smarter to discover later. Which is why our mobile survival plan includes a good mountain bike (so we don't have to depend on fuel and roadways which may be jammed with abandonded vehicles and filled with z's), a powerful sidearm, and a blade.
We're pretty confident that our blade would be effective against z's. We've made them from quality steel and given them a *very* sturdy spine (the main problem with cheap machetes), while at the same time tapering and reducing the blades for balance and speed. The momentum generated is sufficient to sink the sweet spot of these blades nice and deep into freshly milled lumber. Although we haven't been able to support this claim with tests (dammit! anyone want to give us an undead loaner?), we're fairly confident that a good blow at the base of the skull would, at the least, reduce the spinal column to a pulp with the force of the blow alone, if not remove a z's head completely. Exactly how they'd perform on a skull is unknown, but we're looking into ways to test. Thanks for the coconut test idea! We're going to have some fun with that one, and we'll put some video of the results on our site.
Next, we imagine situations in which using a firearm would be dangerous. In many fictional apocalyptic settings, writers have imagined that z's are attracted by loud sounds. Given that, one can imagine many scenarios in which one might have the need and capacity to dispatch a couple z's but not the huge throng that a couple shotgun blasts might attract. A skillfully used blade could handle the problem with stealth. And then there's various mop-up scenarios where it would be a shame to waste bullets on disabled z's....
Finally, there's the distasteful matter of protection against other humans. As I'm sure we've all imagined, under apocalyptic circumstances, frightened, hungry and desperate masses of other humans are likely to be as dangerous, if not moreso, that z's. After the first week of the apocalypse, and the majority of these people have expended the box of ammo they had with their household firearm, most are likely to be armed only with melee weapons. And we'll take our own blades over a Louisville Slugger, an agricultural machete or a cheap Chinese-made katana any day.
As for specific concerns about our blades, some folks seem to take issue with the "pointy" elements in the handle design. None of these elements are very sharp, and the handles are individually sculpted for a good grip and comfort. When shaping the handles, we're handling the blades, swinging them around, and chopping shit to make sure they feel good to us. And they feel good to us. We really like the index finger grip, which gives extra control and ensures a solid grip, especially when pulling the blade out when it's lodged firmly into something (like a skull) and covered in slick gore. The point at the end with the lanyard hole *might* be an issue under weird circumstances, but at the worst it would give you a good scrape. It's very unlikely to give you a puncture wound. But this is an issue we'll continue to think on and may alter slightly in future designs. Also, as an aside, after years of having our knuckles bashed by blades, we're in the habit of wearing quality leather gloves when weilding swords. We wouldn't dream of going into a z-apocalypse without them.
The most disappointing response we've received thus far is the one that mistrusts our weapons because they look cool (thanks!) and we have good photography (and, again, thanks!). It's understandable, but still really sucks, that we're in the habit of viewing quality and style, function and aesthetics, as incompatible. We're striving for both. AND we're trying to keep the costs of these blades out of the >$500 range, which is the price realm you're dealing with for many really good, handcrafted swords. It may be that we can't make a business with high quality, good looking and affordable blades. But we're going to give it a go.
We're currently working on some video projects that will show you these blades in action. We'll post here when they're ready.
Thanks again for the feedback.
-Chris
ZombieTools
Hey 'Zombitools' nice to see that you actually cares about your potential costumers by backing up your claims.
for testing you could use dead pigs (killed in humane ways beforehand) or you could check out this topic
Are you thinking about expaning your assortment, if so could you reveal what you have in mind?
Are international shipments possible? or will you guys just give a f*** about Europe if the shit hits the fan? (hopefully not
)
for testing you could use dead pigs (killed in humane ways beforehand) or you could check out this topic
Are you thinking about expaning your assortment, if so could you reveal what you have in mind?
Are international shipments possible? or will you guys just give a f*** about Europe if the shit hits the fan? (hopefully not

- tilt
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Thanks for the reply Chris. It's nice to see your company's stance and thought process. Might I suggest that you send a sample of each of your blades around to a couple of select ZS members for 'coconut testing' to get a solid third party review of your gear? I would suggest sending them to the users Jeriah and Erik to start with.
Worst case scenario, it gets reviewed on an obscure internet forum, best case is that somebody willl likely purchase a tool or two from your company... just a thought. Hell, if they get reviewed favorably, I'll probably buy one...
Thanks again for stopping by, we hope to see you around.
Worst case scenario, it gets reviewed on an obscure internet forum, best case is that somebody willl likely purchase a tool or two from your company... just a thought. Hell, if they get reviewed favorably, I'll probably buy one...
Thanks again for stopping by, we hope to see you around.
Murphy is my Co-Pilot